There may be those who will never click on this article because they believe that the goal of being happy is selfish. Or..they don’t believe they deserve to be happy.
In my opinion, the happier someone is- the more value they bring to others and this world! I have personally been going through some major challenges in my life the past several months. (I am in a situation that I got myself into- and now I am not having much control over the outcome).
Anyway..I’ve had to be very diligent about staying positive. So below are some of my beliefs and and things I’ve been doing to keep myself Happy:
1. Help Others
Many motivational gurus attest to this statement. When you can add value to other people’s lives, it actually makes you feel better. Not feeling useful is a common trait among people who are not happy.
Take the time to Volunteer for Homeless /Animal Shelters or Organization geared towards Foster Kids. This will open your eyes real quick that there are always people (and pets) in need of a Happy and Joyful person!
2. Be Grateful for What You Already Have
Do you have a roof over your head and food in the fridge? Friends and family that love you? Are you able to view the Starry night sky and hear chirping birds every morning? When we are upset, it’s often easy to overlook all the good that is in our life. Appreciating nature cost nothing, but can make a huge difference in your happiness.
I keep a gratitude journal that I write down at least 5 things I’m grateful for every day. This keeps me focused on what I want to bring into my life vs what I don’t want.
3. Flip Your Thoughts
The moment you start spiraling down into negative self talk, stop yourself. Then- say something that is completely opposite. For example- with my situation. I would start thinking about how it’s going to affect my future and then I would start feeling fearful.
I have been practicing controlling my thoughts and being more aware. As soon as I notice those negative thoughts creeping in, I tell myself that I am always going to be okay. If you’re used to always being in dooms day mode, this could take some work, but controlling your thoughts will help you feel better.
4. Have a POSITIVE outlet for Stress
Binging on icecream, drinking too much alcohol, or sleeping excessively is going to keep you in a negative state. Drinking too much and too often for example leads to negative consequences. It affects how you sleep, you wake up with hang overs..and most importantly, it’s considered a depressant.
On the other hand, positive outlets include exercising (preferably outdoors), spending time with friends and family, creating art etc., or volunteering. These are activities that are uplifting and can only lead to more positive in your life.
5. Mood and Posture
There is a direct correlation between mood and posture. The way your body is positioned can affect your emotions. We tend to slump our shoulders and look down at the ground instinctively when we are sad or depressed.
What if you maintain positive body posture regardless? You may need to fake it before you make it initially. Stand in a position of strength – lift your shoulders back, put your chin up and smile. You’ll see how your mind follows suit once you have a more positive body posture.
6. Do More of What You Love
This one definitely seems like common sense, but I know people who don’t do anything but work. Doing more of what you love are called “Happiness Islands”- coined by Richard Koch in “Living the 80/20 Way”. This is identifying the activities and things you really love to do- and then do more of it.
I realize this is a process and you may need time to eliminate things in your schedule to make room for what you love to do. From what I’ve seen in my life so far, a lot of unhappiness stems from people doing what they don’t want to do. Feeling like their schedule is being dictated by others. You have the power to take back some of this control. For instance- if you are in a job you dislike, start allotting time to look for a new job. Or even better- do some soul searching for your real passion. Then work towards that! Want to work as a Ranger in a State Park? Then look into what degree/training is needed. No one is stopping you from taking positive steps in your life-except you!
7. Spend Less Time w/Negative People
I realize when it comes to family, this is easier said than done. Negative people take so much energy! You only have so many energy units every single day. Not only can negative people drain you mentally, but it affects you physically as well. I have a family member that I HAVE to limit to 20 minutes or less. For Years, she’s been the same. She’ll ask for the same advice over and over, complains, etc. and never does anything! Can you relate? Identify those people that are using you as a sounding board only and don’t add value to your life. Relationships need to be a give and take.
What are your thoughts on these ways to be happy? Would love to hear from you- please leave a comment below!